Howdy - Howdy

Sorry!!!!

I know I have not been posting every day. But like I said earlier, things so far physically are moving in the right direction so I don't want to be boring.

I got home today from Aaron's soccer tryouts and was very excited about my very nice yard. All mowed, edged and weeded. You have no idea how it makes me feel to see such a nice yard!! It takes away a ton of stress..

Believe me I have enough to worry about, just getting through the work day the last few days has been interesting. Its nothing physical its all in my little noodle.

Getting back into the swing of things started out fine. What I didn't realize is how emotional I can be without much to push me over the edge. My customer has been a tad bit "chirpy" regarding my pricing and threatening to pull business (what ever-they wont). Also, for some reason my boss jumped my butt in a meeting I called at his request to fix issues in another department. I had a side bar meeting with him afterwards and still have no idea where he was coming from.

Normally, no big deal!! But, I was shaken up I had trouble getting back into the swing of things. I finally went to restroom , went into the stall and believe it or not I started crying!! I have no clue why..Its embarrassing and absolutely can not continue down that road or I will get eaten alive.

I thought I had my self together but apparently I don't. I am hoping it has to do with my low counts still. If not I hope it goes away soon.

I have to admit I ask myself about a million times a day, what do I do next?? Why did I go through this and what does it mean?? There are people who always say "Things happen for a reason" and I am trying to believe that but lately its been very difficult.

I mean honestly, if things happen for a reason then why did I loose my job 5 time after leaving Omaha in order gain more security (money) for my family and end up with Cancer??

While you are pondering that ask yourself why my 18 year old neighbor who has been battling cancer since middle school finally got his life back 2 years ago, got accepted into OSU only find out he has cancer again 2 months before Graduation.... Think about it...WHY???

What ever the "message" is I don't know yet but I am hoping I will find out.


I just want 2 things for my well deserving family:

1.) A steady well paying CAREER
2.) A well deserved break and vacation for them especially Theresa.


I not looking to get over or big the man on campus. Just take care of my family and take them to a few places they will always remember.

I am not asking for anything from anyone and I am not asking for someone to say, "I'm sorry"... I am just trying to get my sh*&^ together and catch a few breaks.

Yet, when I think of my neighbor I actually feel selfish for complaining. He is still in the hospital and has battled harder then I ever will. Everyone pray for him and his family, please.


Well, this is what I call a 'VENT POST"!! Its the only way I can get this stuff out of my head right now so that I don't drive my wife nuts!!!

But hey, my counts are on the way up and things can only get better!!!

By the way, I would not have been able to get through this with out all of your help and support....

Thanks for listening....